Slob's specimen (featured in Concrete Wave last fall) was entirely "NHS-correct", while I went all-out for "period-correct". Bottom line? Mine looks better! On pigs, wide wheels are the only way to go, if you ask me. The wheels sticking out also gives you a visual reference between the board, wheels, and the coping. Very important, when you have a big, thick, concave-less deck that tends to kill a lot of the "through-the-foot" feedback...
Just the facts, Dudeman:
Width: 10.625" (Massive)
Length: 29.625" (Tight)
Wheelbase: 16.5" (Ridiculous)
Nose: 3.25" (Stubby)
Tail: 5.625" (Oh, shit...*)
The lack of concave becomes awfully apparent, here. As does the tiny, mellow kicktail. The risk, is more than obvious. The reward, though is greater than you could ever imagine...
Concave: Nada, zilch, zippo, and none. But: There's a kicktail! A little one. But, it's there. And, it works.
Bought: Two! Of course. One to hang, and one to ride.
The price: On sale for $47 each.
From: Hirschy at SoCal, as always... (www.socalskateshop.com).
Okay: Why...?!
See... that's why you're clueless, and I'm having more fun than you are right now. Because I got all genius, and bought two of these beauts! The question is: Where's yours...?
If you ask any dumbass kid these days what these kinds of boards are "good" for, they'll probably tell you something like "cruising", "falling on your ass"*, or "not much". Again: That's why kids are clueless, and I'm buying these up as if they're selling out of stock.
Again, the small tail is fully obvious, here. It does provide a lot of leverage, though. Which was, pretty surprising...
Because: They are...!
You see, Santa Cruz only made 1500 of these bad bitches. Last fall. They've been dwindling away ever since, and the current numbers say that there's only about 100 of these left on the open market. And they're on sale, no less. That means: Stop reading this bullshit*, pick up the phone, and call someone that's got one. And then: Buy it. Quick.
Regardless of what "the kids" say, the bottom line is that these boards excel in their intended domain. And, that "intended domain" is: Big-Ass Skatepark Bowls. If you buy one, and strictly use it as a beer-runner? You're fuckin' lost*, dude*. You should be tossed right into jail for that kind of treachery. Seriously...
Here's the real deal: Go find yourself some kinky-ass vert, with real vert (3'+ would be ideal), real pool coping, and some real pain potential... and then, get busy on that shit*. That's the way it's meant to be, folks. "Real"...
The nose is, for all intents and purposes, completely useless. The only thing that it does, is provide a visual hint of where you're going, and how much plank you have left before you step off of it. It takes some getting used to. And, a lot of guts.
These boards are a throwback to skateboarding's heydays, when "men" were men, and real men rode flat pigs. Which is what this board actually is. Not, a "cruiser". Or, a "beer runner". It's a "flat pig". Get it right, people...!
Flat pigs were designed in their day (which was, the very late-1970's, through to the very early 1980's) to dominate the concrete skateboard park pool. And this, they did. Oasis, Upland, Newark, Big O, Lakewood... the names, are legendary. As are, the skaters that piloted these big-ass planks over those harsh environs. Duane Peters* used to win contests on this board, more than thirty years ago. I can barely ollie on it, today. And, that's the fun of it all: Actually going out, and re-living the history... while taking up the challenge of actually riding it, and riding it well, in the most unforgiving of environments. It ain't easy, that much is fersure. It's actually, way harder than I thought it'd be. That lack of concave can be a real killer, actually...
But: It is the best time that you'll ever have on a skateboard. Ever...
Santa Cruz did an outstanding job on this one, by the way. The hype mill says that this was "reverse-engineered from an existing, original deck". My bet is that, this "original deck" just might be one of Slobbo's specimens... but, whatever the case, Cruz totally nailed this shit*. Hard. Authentic, real-deal silkscreening, tough-as-nails wood... what could be better than that?! How about: "Really routed, with real hand-holds, and real wheelwells!" Oh, really now...?! Well, I'll be damned...
Good job on that one, boyz. Keep it up.
The Duane, pictured with it's technical follow-up, the extremely concaved Steve Alba Bevel. Both were designed to take down massive, vertical terrains. But, while the Duane relied on pure guts and brute force to tackle the vert of the day, the Bevel relied on superior engineering and artful sculpting. Thus, they're really quite a study in contrasts. The Bevel is comfortable, refined, and a sheer joy to ride around. The Duane takes some work... and, that's putting it mildly. On the other hand: The Duane brings the "man" out of ya, real fast...
The Set-Up:
Stage 10 Indy 215's, 1/2" risers, and 65mm No Skools in a variety of duros (92a, 94a, and 96a).
It's not perfectly "period-correct", but it's pretty damned close.
You'll also need: Some fast-ass bearings. Fully paid-up medical insurance. A little bit of style. A lot of luck. And, a ton of courage. Then: You're in there. A legend in your own mind, time, and right.
Impress some ladies, and you might get even luckier. If y'know what I mean...*
It's also, kind of a hell-raiser. It makes you into a hell-raiser, too. That good 'ol testosterone gets a' pumpin', and there's just not a whole lotta looking back...! Fun, fun, fun.
Is It Worth It...?
Are you fucking* kidding me?! Hell yeah, it's worth it! It's so good, I actually told Santa Cruz to bump the price back up, and offered to send Mikey at Socal a few extra bucks for shipping and booze*. Mike declined the offer, but it's still solidly on the table. That, my friends, is how good of a ride this bitch is. It is absolutely priceless. Get yours today, and find out for your own damned self.
*We here at The Solitary Life certainly do not condone drinking, excessive cussing, cavorting about town with floozy women, or flagarant dude-isms. On the other hand: It's a Duane, y'know? It kinda brings the badass out of everyone. Even strictly monogamous non-drinkers (like, us).
